Red Army Engages in Battle

The Red Army suits up tonight with a chance to leap-frog a spot in the standings. The team they will be looking to pass happens to be the team they are playing: Cryptic Stench. The two teams share a combined total of two wins, one a piece (each by way of forfeit). The Stench are one point ahead in the Gold Division standings because of their recent tie against Short Bus Boys. Coming off strong performances, all in losses, the past two weeks the Red Army is desperately seeking a tally in the win column. It will not come easily though. Starting goaltender Alex Spitzel will not be tending the twine tonight due to a conflict in schedules. Back-up goaltender Matt Kraus has yet to respond to text messages. More to come on this heightening situation later.

The offensive front remains much the same with Mark Hendricks leading the attack aided by a supporting cast of Hand, Schram, and Duhaime. Peter Hendricks (who last night proposed to long time fan Alene... she said yes) also has been seeing increasing minutes on offense and in turn has been producing. He started the scoring for Red Army last game with a wrist shot from atop the circle that eluded the goaltender.


The defense, when present, can be a shut-down unit. The problem with Mother Russia's defense though is that its overall attendance is worse than nightlife in Rhode Island. Simek, Funk, Lotocki, and Lynch have lost 204,392 man games just this season. While the math doesn't make sense, this does: Russia needs its comrades. Simek has emerged as a top 2 defenseman the past few games, shutting down opposing forwards. If he can find a way to unleash his slapshot (clocked at 203 mph) he could be a double threat.

That's it for now. More to come on the goalie situation later and perhaps a few pre-game quotes.