The Red Army skated themselves to a convincing 6-2 win Tuesday night over the Cryptic Stench in a game that had everything. There were highlight reel goals, highlight reel hits, and potentially even a Gordie Howe hat trick.
"It was a Gordie Howe hat trick, right?" The Beege asked reporters after the game. "I mean, I think that might count as a fight. I went in and took the guys off of Mark, then we started going at it."
The Beege was referring to a scrum that happened as time expired at the end of regulation in the Cryptic zone. With a few seconds remaining, Mark Hendricks skated the puck into the zone slowly, dragging time off the clock with no intention of scoring. He was met in the corner by two Stench players and the two defenders began taking liberties on the star winger. The Beege grabbed hold of one of the players and pulled him off of his older brother, inciting a brief melee between him and a Stench defenseman. The two tangled and wrestled on the ground in the corner.
But a fight?
"I'm not sure," Ben Breiterman, who finished with a goal and two assists, said. "I've seen some fights in my day, and that was good of Beege to go in there, but I'm not sure I would have classified that as a fight. Mark and his partner fought, at least they got some punches in even if the gloves weren't dropped, but I don't know if I'd give Beege the Gordie Howe."
Before things reached the boiling point though, there was some good Soviet hockey played. Captain Steve Hand started the scoring late in the first period when he was the benefactor of a slick Neal Hendricks pass. The younger Hendricks twin finagled a deft pass from behind the net right to the Captain, and he converted from in tight.
"It was like the monkey was off of our back," Hand said. "We couldn't buy a goal for so long. But as Brooks says, if you want money, go to the bank. If you want laughs, go to MacGruber, and if you want goals, go to the net."
On the defensive front, Andy Schram played his most impressive game of the campaign thus far as he steered every shot he faced aside in the opening frame.
"The new goalie stick was working well," Schram said, waving the stick in front of reporters and pointing to the word "Christian" which was boldly printed on the shaft. "I feel like I have the power of God. Or of Mr. Slater."
Breiterman doubled the lead early in the second period, when he finished off a pretty passing play. The Beege fired a pass across the rink to Mark Hendricks as the two crossed the center line. Hendricks took the pass and cut towards the center, drawing two defenders to him before leaving a drop pass to Breiterman. Breiterman took the puck in stride and fired a hard snap shot above the glove and under the bar right where limbo dancers aspire to be.
Then a few minutes later, the much maligned line of late showed that their first period tally was no fluke. Hand won a battle in the corner and found Drew Kelley, who quickly passed to Breiterman, who then fed a seam pass to Neal for the one timer. The puck was in and out of the net before the goalie could react, and the game was beginning to escape the grasp of the smelly tomb dwellers.
"That one was my little middle finger back to the guy who gave my fiancee a middle finger," Kelley said, before continuing, "Eat it, [female hygienic device].
The Stench scored late in the period on a wraparound. Schram was quick, perhaps too quick, going post to post, as the goalie jarred the goal's frame in his lateral movement, giving the shooter a better angle. One the shooter used to pot home a goal that wouldn't have happened if the nets had moorings.
The rest of the period set the stage for the fireworks that would erupt at game's end. A parade of Stench players to the penalty box occurred as frustration mounted.
"It was getting chippy out there," Jamie Simek said. "If one of the guys flicked off Brittany, well, let's just say I don't keep the samurai swords in the car for nothing."
The Stench, while shorthanded again in the third period, capitalized however, and made the score 3-2. Then the second line stepped up again, and went back for thirds.
Breiterman threw a low shot on goal from just inside of the center line, and the rebound kicked right out to Neal, who potted his second of the game.
He would cap off the hat trick as time winded down in the game, taking a pass from Hand to score a power play empty net goal.
Off the ensuing face-off, the Stench pulled their goalie again, and this time the Beege scored. Mark sent a spring pass ahead to the cutting defender-turned-offender, and the elder twin had his first goal of the season.
Then, the rough stuff happened.
"I'm not sure how to call it," Mark said. "I know Tom gave me a fighting major and a game suspension, so even though the gloves stayed on, officially I received a fighting major. Score. But Beege, I'm not sure, I mean, it was definitely a penalty, and probably a double minor if you wanted to have 3rd man in, which might even be a major. I don't know if that's a fight or not. Maybe we should just give it to him."
"No way," interrupted Neal. "Not a fight, and even it was, that's still the worst Gordie Howe hat trick in the history of hockey. A secondary assist, an empty net goal, and a maybe fight. Come one!"
For now, one thing is certain: at the midway mark of the season, the Red Army stands at a more-than respectable 4-2-1. Not bad, Comrades, not bad at all.
THREE STARS:
3: Steve Hand
2: Neal Hendricks
1: Andy Schram
UPDATE: The league just announced that it has met with Mark Hendricks and rescinded its one game suspension. He will be penalized with a game misconduct only, which was served when he was ejected at the end of Tuesday's match-up versus the Cryptic Stench.
No comments:
Post a Comment