Power Rankings-- Mid Season Edition

The season is half way over. What better way to celebrate the midway mark than with some Power Rankings? A trip to Vegas? Ok, yes, I suppose that would be better, but you're not going to go to Vegas. You're at work right now and your boss has asked you three times already this quarter why you keep going to that website with a gigantic hammer and sickle.

You're on a watch-list.

But you're here, so let's take a look around the league to see how the teams stack up.

1. Red Army (7-0-0). Seven games, seven wins. The slimmest margin of victory in those seven victories? Three goals (which has occurred three times). They have scored 55 goals (15 more than the second highest scoring team), they have surrendered 16 goals (13 less than the next best team), and their power play and penalty kill are both clicking at ridiculous rates (75% and 86%, respectively). Though they are far from perfect, the other-worldly goaltending by Kevin Durkin has covered up any and all mistakes committed by the Soviets. Suffice it to say, this team looks good. Scary good. This may be the best Red Army squad ever assembled, and that does not bode well for the other six teams.

2. Prestige Worldwide (4-1-2). The defending champions moved into a tie for second place last night with a key victory over the Puck Ewes. Prestige is arguably the fastest team in the division, and their speed coupled with their physicality makes them a force most teams cannot compete with. They suffered their first regulation loss of the season to the hands of the Soviets earlier in the month, but were without two of their more physical players. Without their bruisers, Prestige loses the intimidating charm they carry so proudly.

3. Trailside (3-3-0). This team is this season's "Jeckly and Hyde". When their good players show up, they can beat the best. When their good players don't show up, their outspoken captain makes excuses they struggle to compete. With Celenski in net, they'll have a chance to win, but their offensive prowess is long gone. They are a wildcard.

4. Puck Ewes (5-2-0). The Puck Ewes are a good team... so long as their playing bad teams. They're five wins have come against weaker teams fielding light rosters. They got beat by Prestige and destroyed by the Soviets. Until they can win a big game, they'll be a team hiding behind an inflated record.

5. Cryptic Stench (2-3-2). They get the five spot because they beat the Shockers last night. Their fabled defensive box structure still makes them tough to play against, but like several teams, the goals aren't coming like they used to. They'll hang around the five or six spot all season long, then be poised for an upset in round one.

6. Shockers (3-4-0). They have a good goalie (Durkin), one of the best forwards in the league (Loges), and a solid set of defensemen. But, like the Puck Ewes, they can't beat the big guns. Like the Stench, they'll finish low in the standings, but have "upset alert" written all over them.

7. Cosby Sweaters (0-7-0). The effort is there but the- you know what, it's been said before. They're winless. They won't be forever.