Red Army short circuits the Shockers; can lock up 7th seed on Sunday

There is no excessive hyperbole needed to inflate drama into the already heated Shocker/Red Army rivalry. Fans are aware of the underlying tension that exists, the league markets the match up more aggressively than Vevo does to any video on Youtube, and players put foil on the fingers. Still, something that gets lost in the "Will there be a fight tonight?" fog that clouds the preview to any Soviets/Shocker game, is the fact that these teams know each other very well. In fact, in this current championship run the Red Army is enjoying, no team has had more cracks at dethroning the Soviets than the Shockers, who have played them four times (5-0 leads are the worst leads in roller hockey). The point I am trying to make here is this: knowledge is power, and the Soviets demonstrated that they are the kings tsars of playing a strategy that is specific to an opponent. On Sunday night, the game plan was to play with an edge, and in doing so, push their opponent over it.

Here are ten notes about the Red Army's 8-5 victory over the Shockers:

• Had the Shockers not shown that they are more than capable to play with only four skaters and a goalie earlier this summer, this win could have been chalked up to simply having more subs. But, that is not the case, and when Louis Wesley and Stefen Loges are two of those four skates and the goalie is Chris Celenski, you have to play well to win. So, just thought I'd clear that up.
• Speaking of the two guns the Shockers had, they combined for six points (three goals and three assists). Mark Hendricks had himself a three goal, three assist night himself.
• And holy secondary scoring did #18 get help on the offensive front last night. Pat King and Ryan Odell chipped in with four point outbursts themselves and Drew Kelley netted a pair of goals. Now, if only that could be something that happened every game...
• His effort won't show up in the score sheet, but the Captain played like a captain tonight. Steve Hand went to the crease, made Celenski very uncomfortable, and was a force that the Shockers simply could not handle. How about some play making skills he's been showing lately too? Eh, how about 'em?
• Tony Horton played defense for the 4th consecutive game, and for the 4th consecutive game, there were very few complaints. Not sure what this guy has changed from earlier in the season, but the hockey he is playing these days is the most well rounded, intelligent, and crisp of his career. Yes, I used the adjective crisp...like an autumn morning or a saucer pass.
  
• Jimma Jam stood his ground in the net, making several key saves when the Soviet skaters stopped skating. He continues to evolve and look more comfortable in net, and apparently is good for two or three jaw dropping saves a game.
• The Soviets can wrap up the 7th seed on Sunday in the season finale versus the Beer Guts. If they win, they will play the 2nd seed, which right now, is a three way tie between the Puck Ewes, the Shockers, and Stuffed Chrus.
• Ben Breiterman was a healthy scratch for the game because his birthday was the night before and his whereabouts at the time of face off were unknown, though police authorities are claiming they have an idea, and "it ain't pretty".
• Scott Hoefer was also a healthy scratch as was Pete Collis. The two of them had other things to do besides win.
• Louis Wesley was furious after the game, and added two angry eyebrows to the already menacing face that is tattooed on his back.

THREE STARS:
3: Steve Hand
2: Pat King
1: Drew Kelley

Power Rankings Week 7

Not much changed at the top in this week's power rankings, but there was some movement as teams try to climb out of the cellar. The Cryptic Stench seem to be slipping from their position in the middle of the pack while we may be seeing the rise of Communism. Here's week 7's edition of the power rankings:

1. Prestige Worldwide: 10-0 (2-0 this week). What more can you say about the best dressed team in the division? They had a convincing win over their arch rivals the Red Army on Thursday, then followed it up with a win by forfeit over the Cryptic Stench last night. They aren't blowing teams out, but they're winning... every single game. That's why they remain at the top.
2. Stuffed Chrus: 7-2-1 (1-0 this week). Stuffed Chrus has a ruff rough road ahead of them to close out the regular season. They are fortunate to be playing games mostly on Sundays (Mike Zyuzin is no longer available for Tuesday or Thursday night games) but they will see the likes of the Black Presidents, Puck Ewes, and Prestige Worldwide in their final three games. If they want that two seed, they're going to have to earn it.
3. Shockers: 7-3-1 (2-0 this week). The Shockers have proven that they have as much offensive firepower as anyone this season. They are breathing down the necks of Stuffed Chrus for the 2nd seed, and with a relatively easy schedule remaining (Red Army, Cryptic Stench, and Daggermouth 2.0) they could very well continue their ascent.
4. Black Presidents: 5-5 (0-1 this week). The Black Presidents are the "recipients" of the fourth spot mostly because they had the least abysmal week of the three teams in the middle of the pack. Their only game of the week was a close loss to the Shockers. With four games remaining, they could finish anywhere from 2nd place to 7th place.
5. Puck Ewes: 6-4 (0-1 this week). The Puck Ewes suffered a debilitating loss at the hands of the Soviets last night and wasted a golden opportunity to put some space between them and the Stench and Black Presidents. Isn't it a bit early for the team to begin it's seasonal demise?
6. Cryptic Stench: 6-5 (0-2 this week). Though the score of 10-8 may seem like they played Stuffed Chrus close, the Stench scored three goals in the final 90 seconds of the game after things were all but wrapped up. They followed up that game with a forfeit to Prestige Worldwide. They have three games remaining, but all three are against teams higher than them in the standings. If they lose out and the team below them wins out, well, it's no secret how much better the 6th seed is than the 7th seed when you see who occupies seeds 1 and 2.
7. Red Army: 3-7-1 (1-1 this week). After losing to their rivals Prestige Worldwide, the Soviets rebounded for an impressive 4-1 victory over the Puck Ewes this week. It looks like they are starting to rediscover their game, which is bad news for other teams. They'll get a good test tomorrow night when they face the Black Presidents. If they win that game, then the kids will be right: there's a monster in the basement.
8. Beer Guts: 2-8-1 (1-1 this week). The Beer Guts continue to do what they've done all season: beat Daggermouth 2.0 and lose to everyone else.
9. Daggermouth 2.0: 0-9-1 (0-1 this week). Daggermouth 2.0 continues to do what they've done all season: lose to everyone.
   

Soviets show shades of past in impressive win over Puck Ewes

It finally happened: in the eleventh game of the regular season, the Red Army played a complete 45 minutes of hockey against a difficult opponent and came out victorious. They took the lead just 42 seconds into the game and never looked back. They owned the puck, out skated and out worked the Puck Ewes, and showed that, at least for one night, they can hang with the big boys.

"Confidence is key," Mark Hendricks said following the win. "This was a confidence builder for us. We have played so many close games this season but always seem to lose. This game was close until late in the third and then we pulled away. At this point I don't care if we win by one goal or ten, it feels good to win. I want to see us continue to play like tonight, because if we do, I'm not sure there's a team that can beat us."

Hendricks helped to get the scoring started early in the game when he fed Ryan Odell a pass in the slot and the defender fired a low snap shot just inside the post. The goal, which on the score sheet was credited as #14 from #18, was scored at 14:18.

"We planned it that way," Odell joked after the game. "It was a good play, and that whole first shift we were doing a great job of talking to each other. [Pat King] went to the front of the net and [Scott Hoefer] did a great job in the corners. By the time I got the puck, I think all four of us had touched the puck within the last five or six seconds."

A few minutes later the Comrades would strike again, this time while on the power play. Tony Horton, playing his second consecutive game on defense, activated from the point and took a slick feed from Pete Collis. Horton fired a shot that somehow found the top corner of the net, and the forward-turned-defender had his second goal in as many games.

"I knew I didn't have a good angle, but I thought I saw some daylight upstairs," Horton said. "I just got the shot off quick, and as I was skating behind the net I saw it was lying behind the goalie. The best part was that there was no holding call on the play to nullify the score."

The Soviets were able to take a 2-0 lead into the first intermission thanks to stellar goaltending by recently called up backup goalie Chris Celenski. Celenski was an emergency call up after Jamie Simek was a late scratch due to a football emergency in Seattle.

Though the second period saw opportunities for both teams, neither was able to capitalize. A great penalty kill to end the middle frame by the Comrades maintained their two goal bulge entering the third.

"We just made sure we were always having our sticks in passing lanes and making smart clears," Ben Breiterman said. "Plus I tried a nice little move on the breakaway while I was shorthanded, but I ended up just bowling over the goalie. All part of the plan."

About midway through the third period, the Soviets finally got the insurance marker they were looking for. Hoefer took a pass from Hendricks and fired a wrist shot that beat the goalie five hole. The shot was clocked at 17 miles per hour.

"I'm not even sure the puck hit the back of the net," Hoefer said to reporters after the game. "I didn't get all of it, but [King] was setting the screen and I don't think the goalie even knew the puck has been fired. I mean, I think it took about eight or nine seconds for the puck to reach the goal, so he had plenty of time to react, but like I said, it was a great screen."

With the score 3-0, the Puck Ewes tried to mount offense as time wound down, but with a short bench and a stingy defense, they played into a Soviet trap that was bent on creating chances on the counter attack. After Hendricks broke up a Puck Ewe rush with a well timed poke check, the forward raced down the wing and dished a saucer pass to Horton. Horton, who just can't seem to miss these days, fired a shot that was faster than the lateral movements of the goaltender, and in the blink of an eye the lead became an insurmountable four goals.

"That Horton is so hot right now," Captain Steve Hand said, before folding his piano key necktie.

In the final minute, Celenski's bid for a shutout was ruined after a wrap around beat him moving post to post. Celenski was unavailable for comment, but he was heard muttering something to himself as he skated towards the locker room of another team which he inevitably plays for.

For now, the Comrades improve their record to 3-7-1 and look to establish their first winning streak of the season on Tuesday night against the Black Presidents. With their position as the 7th seed all but solidified, the Comrades are playing mostly for pride at this point. Pride breeds confidence, and that's something every other team in the division would like them to be devoid of come playoff time.

THREE STARS:
3: Mark Hendricks (3 assists)
2: Scott Hoefer (1 goal, 1 assist, 1 drawn penalty)
1: Tony Horton (2 goals)

Prestige Worldwide 8, Red Army 3

Last night's tilt between arch rivals Prestige Worldwide and the Red Army provided a snapshot of two teams moving in opposite directions. Prestige Worldwide, now 9-0, is the clear front runner to win the division and a heavy favorite to win the Jenkin's Cup. The Red Army on the other hand ensured that they will endure a losing record this season with the loss.

But does it phase the Comrades?

"We have a lot of talent and we have a lot of effort. Sometimes one is there and the other is not, but when they're both there, we win games," Mark Hendricks said. "We're going to start playing that way from here on out. We're going to skate harder, play smarter, and start winning games. Mark these words, even if we don't move up a spot in the standings, we will enter the playoffs on a four game winning streak."

"I'm not sure," Ryan Odell said, before adding, "But I support the idea, and will fight to back up this guarantee."

That was the big news from last night, and because I've been working all day and have to take a nap run some errands before heading out this evening, I will recap this game in five bullet points:

• Like so many other contests this season, the Comrades took too long to discover where they were achieving success. By the time they realized they could outwork PW in the corners and play a cycle game, like so many other contests this season, it was too little too late.
• The highlight of the game came 15 seconds into the 3rd period when Odell sent an 80 foot tape-to-tape pass to Hendricks and Hendricks one timed the puck home from nearly a zero degree angle.
• Hendricks had also won the aforementioned face off as well.
• Tony Horton played an exceptional game and got the Soviets on the board with a low snap shot midway through the 2nd period.
• Prestige Worldwide scored more goals than the Comrades and swept the season series. They were not able to stop that goal at the start of the 3rd period though, and I can not emphasize that point enough.

THREE STARS:
3: Ryan Odell
2: Jason Mastaler
1: Mike "Gooch Bag" D'Ignazio

Game #10: Red Army vs Prestige Worldwide

There is a lot to cover before tonight's puck drop. For Prestige Worldwide, it's a chance to sweep the season series, retain the Soviet Tuxedo, and improve their record to a perfect 9-0. For the Comrades, it's a chance to announce to the rest of the league that the road to the championship still goes through Moscow.

I've got a radio interview with G38.3 Kavitsha (a German sports talk station based out of Munich) but I plan on updating the blog here with all of your game day needs by no later than 2:00 pm EST. Until then, read the article about the R.A.D.'s continued growth below, and also, feel free to use the comments section as a board for heated trash talking. Those Germans love it.

Appealing to the Masses

At the risk of coming across as cocky, pretentious, and like we just received a diploma from Mr. Jefferson's University, we here at the Red Army Digest are both pleased and honored to announce that we have established a loyal fan base that encompasses much of the globe. Yes fellow Comrades, it is true. While Stalin's dream of Communist Red covering the globe (interesting fact: this dream was also shared by paint enthusiast Sherman William's) was never realized, the R.A.D.'s dream of being read by anyone living on the globe is most certainly being achieved. From Bangkok to Brasilia, people, for reasons simply unexplainable, can't get enough of the Red Army.

Where are these facts coming from? Well, Blogger (the company that publishes this blog) recently updated its metric that tracks hits that each blog generates. Blogger added two very interesting new tools that news sources (like us) can use to see just who exactly is scrolling through the content. Those tools are 1) an audience map, which shows exactly how many hits have been generated from specific countries, and 2) traffic sources, which shows what sites link this blog the most frequently and what are the most popular keywords searched that bring people to the blog.

Get it? Good.

So what country reads us the most? Well, not surprisingly, the United States of America. This week, 97% of our readers were reading while on American soil. The other 3% was made up of Canada, Georgia (where the Soviets have obvious ties), South Korea, Germany, and the Netherlands. But this week was not ordinary, and to get a grander scope of things let's zoom out to last month, where the US supplied only 71% of the readers. Brazil, Luxembourg, and Lithuania joined the mix, but none rivaled the interest shown by Germany, who gave us 27% of our viewers. Who does anyone know in Germany that would follow the Red Army? Surely it is a fluke right? The month is an out liar? Well, not really. All time, 32% of our readers have been from Germany. Other countries with significant contributions (over 1%) include Russia, Ukraine, and all of the aforementioned countries sans Georgia (come on Peter, you're living in the only country we'd expect to give us hits and you're giving us >1% effort... this isn't Target).

So why the German love affair? We have absolutely no idea, we only know that both Tony Horton and Scott Hoefer are somehow involved.

Next, we move to the traffic sources. The first half of this is expected. Of the top 10 places people click to read an article on the Red Army hockey team, four are from the Prestige Worldwide blog, three are from Google (US, UK, and RU), one is from Peter and Alene's blog, one is from the blogger website, and one is from Facebook.

But the searches? The things that have been searched enough (sometimes only twice) to make the top 10 keywords people search while trying to find the blog? Well, take a look for yourself:

#10: Brad Lotocki the knot
#9: Brad Lotocki dating
#8: Army fisting
#7: Andy Schram fetish porn
#6: "Andy Schram" dead
#5: Ryan Odell
#4: Red Army blog
#3: Phil Tiller
#2: Brad Lotocki
#1: Red Army Digest

What to make of all of this? Who loves Brad and hates Andy? Who the hell is Phil Tiller? Well, we don't know the answer to any of those questions except the last one: he was Neal and Brian Hendricks' high school cross country coach. Why is he on the list? Your guess is as good as ours. The only thing we can clear up is the "Army fisting" search, which we are guessing (keyword here: guessing) is in reference to the article "Red Army Fists Shockers", in which Ben Breiterman KO'd Loges. That article remains one of the highest read articles in R.A.D. history, and logic would dictate that people simply searched the article's title when being told by friends. Still, given Andy Schram's apparent affinity for fetish porn, I would not eliminate ulterior motives from being sought while searching.

So what do we make of all of this? How can we use this information to increase our popularity even more? Well, we don't really know yet. All we do know is that there is going to be a dramatic increase in Nazi jokes.

Happy Rosh Hashanah everyone!

The Unbiased Mustache: 1st Installment

Hello all! As this is my first post on this blog, I feel a brief introduction is in order. First though, I must express my most sincere gratitude towards the Red Army Digest Staff for allowing me to contribute to this blog. I look forward to a long and prosperous relationship with the R.A.D. and covering some great hockey (so long as it is played within the confines of the rulebook, LOL!).

Anyways, the introduction: My name is Tom Junior and I am a referee for all of the great inline hockey leagues at Dulles Sportsplex. I have been a referee for a few years now, so long in fact that I even reffed some games back in the olden days when inline hockey was played with a ball (OMG!). As for the writing aspect of this job, I grew up in Des Moines, Iowa, which as anyone will tell you, is a breeding ground for successful writers. I'm sure everyone has heard of Ethel Brooks and Candy Ladson, the co-founders of Iowa's most popular trucking magazine, "Weigh Station Weekly", or picked up an edition of Maggie Grimson's "Harvests and Hoedowns" at the dentist's office. I don't mean to brag, but us Iowans are good at writing (and growing corn of course! :-D) So with that in mind, I hope you get to know me better over the next few weeks and I get to know you better as well. And most of all, I hope you enjoy these weekly columns!

ITEM 1: High-sticking, the new tripping?
Watch out folks, there's a new fad sweeping the league and it's giving several players more reasons to wear a cage. I'm talking about the slew of high sticking penalties that have been called recently. I don't know if something in the water or if it's just because there is more competition this season, but my oh my have there been a lot of high sticking calls. In season's past, the most popular penalty call was tripping by a long shot, and I'd venture to guess that over 50% of penalties called were that of the tripping variety. This season, other calls like roughing, elbowing, slashing, and interference have experienced resurgences as well, but still, they all pale in comparison to the high stick's comeback. Luckily, there has only been one four minuter handed out so far. Keep your sticks down, boys (:P)

ITEM 2: The most confusing rule in the world.
Perhaps another positive that can come out of this blog is a chance for me to explain some of the rules that players find confusing. There is one rule that stands head and shoulders above the rest in the confusion department, and that is how come a player is allowed to get away with an apparent trip just because he touched the puck first? If a defending player lunges for the puck, misses it, and trips the forward, it is a penalty, BUT, if the defender is making a play for the puck and MAKES CONTACT with the puck FIRST, AND THEN the forward goes down, there is not a penalty. In the latter case, the puck was played cleanly, and the trip that happened after would be considered incidental. Often times, this play happens in the blink of an eye, and every member of the team that saw their teammate getting tripped is up in arms. If I had stocked footage of inline hockey to give examples, I would, but I don't. I do have NHL footage though, and the two different leagues share many of the same rules including this one, which you can see here.

ITEM 3: A meditation on the importance of team chemistry
I'm a sucker for group dynamics. I find the subject interesting, and skating back and forth past the benches gives me an inside look at every team. There are a few teams I want to point out as having incredibly thick skin (no, not because they exfoliate!) and a few teams that unravel at the first sign of distress. First, the even keeled ones. Cryptic Stench, the Shockers, and Prestige Worldwide all have displayed a great amount of levelheaded-ness in times of peril. The Stench perhaps more so than anyone, simply because they never seem to be phased by anything good or bad. The Shockers and Prestige Worldwide have both been involved in a few games that have turned ugly, but the talk on the bench revolves around cracking the other team's system, not about cracking the refs skulls. The same can not be said about Daggermouth 2.0 and the Black Presidents. Daggermouth 2.0 quickly implodes on themselves and play the blame game more than anyone else. The Black Presidents on the other hand take every penalty personally. Each time they take a penalty, or give up a goal for that matter, they blame the referees. Yes, sometimes we do miss calls, or make the wrong calls, but there is no video replay in this league, so whatever the call was, it's going to stay that way. That is never enough for the Black Presidents however, and they end up fighting a two front war the whole game against their opponents and the referees, and, as any student of history will tell you, two front wars tend to end poorly (see Germany, World War I & World War II).


Now, in the future, I plan on doing five items a post, but with time constraints and a referee convention in Wichita tomorrow, I have to cut this one short. I hope you enjoyed this inaugural post, and as I will end every post with, here are some quick hits:

Dumbest Penalty of the Week: Chris Celenski, while playing goalie, threw his stick at a player after being nudged in the corner.

Best Trashtalk of the Week: A member of the Stench, after blocking two consecutive shots and deflecting an attempted pass by the same member of Daggermouth 2.0, resets his position on defense and waits for the Daggermouth 2.0 player to make another play. Stench player says, "Your move again, Douchebag."

Worst Goal of the Week: A member of the Shockers tried to bat the puck away from the goal, but inadvertently volleyball slammed the puck into his own net.

Best Game of the Week: Prestige Worldwide's 4-3 overtime victory over the Shockers.

Worst Game of the Week: Cryptic Stench's 12-1 victory over Daggermouth 2.0.


And remember, if you have a better name than the "Unbiased Mustache", let us know in the comments section.

A closer look at a loss that has (unfortunately) defined a season

Sunday night's loss to Stuffed Chrus was the perfect storm of defeats: there was a soul-crushing element, a heavy dosage of heart-break, and a side of gut-wrenching of epic proportions. Most analysts, including Bill Clement (circa 2008), are referring to the loss as a "microcosm of the Red Army season", and as Tarik El Bashir so aptly defined it from his twitter account, "There were ups, there were downs, and in the end, there were totes more downs."

So let's try to get some answers. If last game really was a microcosm of the season, let's break the action down to understand exactly what went wrong, when it went wrong, why it went wrong, and most importantly, how to fix the problems. So without further ado, here are a few of the moments from last Sunday's contest that not only defined a game, but a season as well.

-First period, under five minutes remaining. Stuffed Chrus leads 3-1.
After surrendering the first three goals of the game, the Soviets finally capitalize on their offensive chances when Mark Hendricks finishes off a strong rush to the net. Immediately, wind is restored into the Soviet sails. However, on the ensuing shift, Tony Horton makes a no-look drop pass towards the point, which is intercepted by Chris Celenski (though intercepted phrases it nicely- the pass was from Horton's tape to Celenski's tape) and Celenski has a clear cut breakaway going the other way which he promptly deposits home.

Now, we can't be too hard on Horton here. It was an honest mistake, and heaven knows how many times we get on players for not using the points enough. The mistake was made with the best intentions, but it is the timing and riskiness of it all that kills us... and the Comrades. With a few minutes to go in the frame and your team just scoring a goal, the mindset has to be throw the puck on goal. Not only that, but Horton had a lane to shoot the puck (albeit on his backhand) and Hendricks was setting a screen. Even if the puck is stopped, Hendricks could have come up with a rebound to stash home or earned a faceoff in the zone. The point is, you have to know who you are playing, and Stuffed Chrus has too many weapons to justify throwing a puck into space hoping it lands on one of your defender's blades. You can be comfortable around dogs, but you have to be smart around wolves.

-Second period, midway mark. Score tied 4-4.
The Red Army has just scored three straight goals to storm back and tie the game. They are owning the puck, blocking shots, and enjoying long stays in the offensive zone. Then, they stop doing all of those things. The defense unravels, the forwards rush the puck, and the shots aren't blocked by anyone, defender or goaltender. The game becomes 5-4, 6-4, and 7-4 in the blink of an eye, and all of the hard work that had gone into tying the game (roughly 11 or 12 minutes of good hockey) is nullified in one and a half bad shifts of hockey.

Unlike the previous example, there is no lone scapegoat in this case. Instead, there are eight (I will spare the goalie because is not on the roster). All four defensemen and all four offensemen, for whatever reason, deemed it acceptable to take a few minutes off after playing inspired hockey. That will happen, it shouldn't, but it does. Complacency seeps into Mother Russia's veins with the meanest of feats. The disease this season has evolved, and for lack of a better term, become rabid. When being scored on in seasons past, it was an instant wake up call. The troops recovered, rallied, and responded. This season, when being scored upon, it doesn't register. So another goal against occurs. Then another. And another. By the time the Comrades make their patented late game surge, the damage has been done.

-Last minute of 2nd period - first five minutes of 3rd period. Stuffed Chrus leads 7-4.
Immediately following Stuffed Chrus' seventh tally, Ben Breiterman takes the puck near center and races the length of the rink to score a goal in what would be the final play of the middle stanza. To open the period, Hendricks converts on a breakaway after beating a defender and then moments later, converts on another breakaway after Scott Hoefer delivers a 100 foot pass.

If we are going to keep this "microcosm of the season" tag line valid, then we need to send some positives the Red Army's way. By my math, with a record of 2-6-1, the Red Army wins just under 25% of the games they play (if you take out the overtime loss, it is exactly 25%). So, since I wanted to do four defining moments, one of them had to be a good one. To me, this five or six minute sequence was the finest five or six minutes of the season. A good team (golden a year prior) has a stranglehold on the game and supplied back to back to back daggers heading into the 3rd period. But, before the horn can sound to end the period, a great individual effort by Breiterman decreases the lead to two and has a statement feel about it, like "Not so fast, this division technically is still ours 'til somebody eliminates us". Then Hendricks, while pseudo-cherry picking, scores two quick goals to start the third and gets Uncle Mo right back on Mother Russia's side. The Red Army, because of players like Hendricks and Breiterman, have quick strike potential. They also have players like Horton, like Steve Hand, like Drew Kelley, that do dirty work and open up room for others. They have a team of players that, when everyone does their job, is pretty damn tough to beat. Of course, you can't have people clocking out early or showing up late.

-Third period, 29 seconds remaining. Score tied 8-8.
Celenski skates the puck out through center and passes the puck off to a teammate. Celenski, who was being guarded by Hendricks, continues skating and heads to the front of the net. Hendricks, stops skating, watches the puck, and allows Celenski to float into the high slot completely untouched. Celenski receives a pass and delivers the knock out blow, firing a high wrist shot into the net.

We love Hendricks. He scores goals, he makes plays, and he's fun to watch. But make no mistake about it people, the reason the Red Army didn't even got one point out of Sunday's meltdown was because of #18. There is absolutely no reason to allow Celenski to become that wide open. It was a dropped assignment. Hendricks has said he wants to focus on his defensive game this season, and by the looks of it, Hendricks has 20/5000 vision. Hendricks has said in the past that he thought the Red Army could compete with some of the golden teams. Well, it's time to start putting your money where your mouth is, and that means playing at both ends of the rink. It means that no matter what the score is, how much time is left, or how much gas is left in the tank, you find a man and you cover him. Everyone knows that in the Empire that is the Red Army, Hendricks is emperor.

Well right now, Rome is burning.

Red Army Digest Staff Adds New Writer

We here at the R.A.D. are pleased to announce that we have inked a new writer to our team: Tom Jr. Though it may not excite our readers as much as, say, a new stay at home defenseman, we are confident that our loyal browsers are going to enjoy Tom Jr.'s candid outlook from the referee perspective, as well as his take on the action all around the league (instead of the fairly biased reporting that we typically supply).

Tom Jr.'s weekly column, "Play the Puck!" will appear every Friday morning beginning this week.

Editor's Note: If you think you have a more interesting title for the column, one that incorporates a play on words with a penalty and/or writing, please let us know in the comments section. If yours is picked, you will win a free beer on the Red Army Digest Staff.